Dying Words

I don't need you to worry for me cause I'm alright

I don't want you to tell me it's time to come home

I don't care what you say anymore, this is my life

Go ahead with your own life, leave me alone

They will tell you, you can't sleep alone in a strange place

Then they’ll tell you, you can't sleep with somebody else

Ah, but sooner or later you sleep in your own space

Either way it's okay to wake up with yourself

            Billy Joel 1978

You're dying (don't worry, we’re playing make believe tonight).  You have a teenage son.  Unfortunately, you only have time to tell him one last thing.  (I know this is a random thing to blog about, but I have an excellent defense: I have random thoughts running through my brain 24/7). So what piece of advice would you give him? Take good care of your mother? Be a good Christian/Jew/Muslim? Don't sleep with strangers?

Good ones all.  For me, though, it would be this: Don't worry about what other people think.  From what I've seen, this is the single biggest impediment to happiness and fulfillment.  First, I have never met a truly successful person who cares about what others think.  Never. Second, it paralyzes people from doing what they really want to do in life.  The fear of being perceived by others as a failure (which is not the same as being a failure), leads to inaction.  This fear is so strong that for most people it overwhelms the potential reward of living the life that they dream about.  Most of all, the lifelong worry of what others think and subsequent failure to act leads to the cruelest disease of all - regret.

So take a swing, friend.  Start your own business, you’ve been thinking about it long enough.  Your kids won’t starve.  Your wife will respect the fact that you’re taking a chance for the family.  Trust me.  And if it doesn't work out? The people who count will understand how hard it is to do.  And you’ll just be more motivated to try again. 

So tell her that you love her. You may lose a friend but you may gain a wife.

Maybe living in Paris or Jerusalem for a year is not so crazy after all. 

Whatever “it” is, it needs to happen, and it can’t be based on what others think.  No one knows you better than you do.

Have a good night everyone.

                                                JR